fight-0ff-yourdem0ns:

I just wanna have abs…olutely all the pasta and breadsticks

sexy-vegan:

Whoa this is actually powerful

sexy-vegan:

Whoa this is actually powerful

unjolras:

my body isnt a temple my body is a castle with a moat and crocodiles and a dragon who will set you on fire if you touch me

"Not being able to wear leggings because it’s ‘too distracting for boys’ is giving us the impression we should be guilty for what guys do."

Sophie Hasty, age 13

Responding to her middle school’s ban on shorts, leggings and yoga pants for girls.

(via elledeau)

"My problem is that I fall in love with words, rather than actions. I fall in love with ideas and thoughts, instead of reality. And it will be the death of me."

Unknown (via punksnouis)

A message from Anonymous


What's it like being an adult

stupidstagram:

"should i buy a news paper? i have the cnn app? does that count? should i buy a coffee maker? it will probably save me a lot of money? but then i have to buy coffee beans? i dont know shit about coffee beans! should i act like i’m reading this bottle of wine for a few minutes before i head straight to the discount vodka section? should i go to the supermarket and buy broccoli? i fucking hate broccoli did i just get invited to a fucking dinner party .. …what do you bring to a dinner party???? TAX SEASON SHOTS FOR EVERYONE! next thing i know i’m staring at a ceiling that is not my own did i just burn toast? how did i make it this far in life without fucking DYIGN i’m so DUMB and sTUPD and i cant do anyhtign  right.. yeah hey mom yeah i’m fine how are you" 

jumpingjaverts:

image

you got designer shades just to hide your face and you wear them around like you’re cooler than me and you never say hey or remember my name and its probably cause you think you’re cooler than me

"Hemingway and James Joyce were drinking buddies in Paris. Joyce was thin and bespectacled; Hemingway was tall and strapping. When they went out Joyce would get drunk, pick a fight with a bigger guy in the bar and then hide behind Hemingway and yell, “Deal with him, Hemingway. Deal with him.”"

[x] (via newzerokaneda)

Between this and the story about him reassuring F. Scott Fitzgerald re dick size, I’m developing a picture of Hemingway as the mother hen of the disaffected white male literary set of the early 20th century.

He probably called up Steinbeck sometimes and was like I CAN’T EVEN WITH THESE DIPSHITS and Steinbeck was all “That’s what you get for living in Paris, asshole”.

(via copperbadge)

thatdamneddame:

jethrocane:

last-on-your-lips:

ninthdoctorsbutt:

jethrocane:

LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING ABOUT THIS STUFF
I BOUGHT IT
MONTHS AGO
TRIED IT ONCE
I THOUGHT IT WAS HORRIBLE
IT WAS STICKY AND CEMENTED MY LIPS TOGETHER
IT GOT ON EVERYTHING 
IT DIDN’T SUPER-STAY
I THREW IT INTO MY DRAWER WITHOUT ANOTHER THOUGHT
AND THEN OUT OF THE BLUE I DECIDED TO TRY IT AGAIN
HOPE IN MY HEART, PEACE IN MY SOUL, I DECIDED TO TRY IT AGAIN
I READ THE DIRECTIONS
AND ALL OF A SUDDEN, I SAW THE LIGHT
I COULD SEE CLEARLY NOW, THE RAIN WAS GONE
TURNS OUT
YOU HAVE TO PUT THE RED STUFF ON FIRST
WAIT FOR IT TO DRY
COMPLETELY (I MISSED THIS STEP BEFORE)
IT SHOULD BE SO DRY AND IF YOU KISS THE BACK OF YOUR HAND, NO MARK SHOULD SHOW
AND THEN I PUT THE BALM ON (I ORIGINALLY TRIED PUTTING THE BALM ON FIRST…. DON’T DO THAT.)
AND IT GOT RID OF ALL THE STICKINESS
AND THE RED DOESN’T EVEN GET ALL UP IN THE WHITE BALM
IT WAS A MIRACLE 
THIS STUFF IS THE FUCKING BEST
IT STAYS ON FOR A REALLY LONG TIME
IT DOESN’T GET ON ANYTHING
AMAZING I WANT TO BUY THIS IN FORTY SHADES OKAY I ENCOURAGE YOU ALL TO TRY IT

NO BUT DO KEEP IN MIND THAT IT REALLY DOES STAY ON FOR A VERY VERY LONG TIME
AS IN, LONG ENOUGH TO FORCE YOU TO SCRUB IT OFF AT THE END OF THE DAY
THIS STUFF ISN’T FOR THE WEAK, THIS IS FOR THE POWERFUL BADASSES WHO WASH THE BLOOD OF THEIR ENEMIES OUT OF THEIR CLOTHES AT THE END OF THE DAY LIKE ITS NOTHING

I USE THIS SHIT
AND NO
IT IS NOT FOR THE WEAK.
IT WILL SURVIVE YOUR THREE TO FIVE MEALS.
IT WILL SURVIVE YOUR DATE
IT WILL SURVIVE YOUR MARTINI AND EVERY BEER YOU DRINK.
IT EVEN SURVIVES BLOW JOBS.
IT WON’T STAY ON A GLASS SO YOU CAN GO ASSASSINATE SOMEBODY AND DRINK THEIR WINE. GO CATWOMAN. JUST DO IT.
BUT THIS SHIT IS NOT FOR THE WEAK

1) truuuuuuuuuuuu
2) your url is extremely fitting for this post thank u


I LEGIT WENT TO THE DENTIST AND NONE OF IT CAME OFF. THE DENTAL HYGENIST WAS SO FUCKING IMPRESSED BECAUSE THAT NEVER HAPPENS.YOU CAN FALL ASLEEP IN THIS SHIT, WAKE UP, AND JUST WALK OUT THE FUCKING DOOR WITH YOUR RED LIPS AND YOU SMOKEY EYE FROM SLEEP EYELINER LOOKING FIERCE AS SHIT

THIS STUFF IS ACTUALLY AMAZING

thatdamneddame:

jethrocane:

last-on-your-lips:

ninthdoctorsbutt:

jethrocane:

LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING ABOUT THIS STUFF

I BOUGHT IT

MONTHS AGO

TRIED IT ONCE

I THOUGHT IT WAS HORRIBLE

IT WAS STICKY AND CEMENTED MY LIPS TOGETHER

IT GOT ON EVERYTHING 

IT DIDN’T SUPER-STAY

I THREW IT INTO MY DRAWER WITHOUT ANOTHER THOUGHT

AND THEN OUT OF THE BLUE I DECIDED TO TRY IT AGAIN

HOPE IN MY HEART, PEACE IN MY SOUL, I DECIDED TO TRY IT AGAIN

I READ THE DIRECTIONS

AND ALL OF A SUDDEN, I SAW THE LIGHT

I COULD SEE CLEARLY NOW, THE RAIN WAS GONE

TURNS OUT

YOU HAVE TO PUT THE RED STUFF ON FIRST

WAIT FOR IT TO DRY

COMPLETELY (I MISSED THIS STEP BEFORE)

IT SHOULD BE SO DRY AND IF YOU KISS THE BACK OF YOUR HAND, NO MARK SHOULD SHOW

AND THEN I PUT THE BALM ON (I ORIGINALLY TRIED PUTTING THE BALM ON FIRST…. DON’T DO THAT.)

AND IT GOT RID OF ALL THE STICKINESS

AND THE RED DOESN’T EVEN GET ALL UP IN THE WHITE BALM

IT WAS A MIRACLE 

THIS STUFF IS THE FUCKING BEST

IT STAYS ON FOR A REALLY LONG TIME

IT DOESN’T GET ON ANYTHING

AMAZING I WANT TO BUY THIS IN FORTY SHADES OKAY I ENCOURAGE YOU ALL TO TRY IT

NO BUT DO KEEP IN MIND THAT IT REALLY DOES STAY ON FOR A VERY VERY LONG TIME

AS IN, LONG ENOUGH TO FORCE YOU TO SCRUB IT OFF AT THE END OF THE DAY

THIS STUFF ISN’T FOR THE WEAK, THIS IS FOR THE POWERFUL BADASSES WHO WASH THE BLOOD OF THEIR ENEMIES OUT OF THEIR CLOTHES AT THE END OF THE DAY LIKE ITS NOTHING

I USE THIS SHIT

AND NO

IT IS NOT FOR THE WEAK.

IT WILL SURVIVE YOUR THREE TO FIVE MEALS.

IT WILL SURVIVE YOUR DATE

IT WILL SURVIVE YOUR MARTINI AND EVERY BEER YOU DRINK.

IT EVEN SURVIVES BLOW JOBS.

IT WON’T STAY ON A GLASS SO YOU CAN GO ASSASSINATE SOMEBODY AND DRINK THEIR WINE. GO CATWOMAN. JUST DO IT.

BUT THIS SHIT IS NOT FOR THE WEAK

1) truuuuuuuuuuuu

2) your url is extremely fitting for this post thank u

I LEGIT WENT TO THE DENTIST AND NONE OF IT CAME OFF. THE DENTAL HYGENIST WAS SO FUCKING IMPRESSED BECAUSE THAT NEVER HAPPENS.

YOU CAN FALL ASLEEP IN THIS SHIT, WAKE UP, AND JUST WALK OUT THE FUCKING DOOR WITH YOUR RED LIPS AND YOU SMOKEY EYE FROM SLEEP EYELINER LOOKING FIERCE AS SHIT

THIS STUFF IS ACTUALLY AMAZING

ghostkitten69:

awwww-cute:

My brother’s cat, Otis. He sat like this for 15 minutes, totally transfixed. Every time they would roar, he meowed back

dream big, Otis

ghostkitten69:

awwww-cute:

My brother’s cat, Otis. He sat like this for 15 minutes, totally transfixed. Every time they would roar, he meowed back

dream big, Otis

solluxey:

ghostgif:

anti-social-texting:

flamingos really piss me off like what the hell are they doing?

lookin 4 tha party

single and ready to flamingle 

A message from Anonymous


Your Arab aren't you? Have you ever dated a terrorist

yawayli:

nah I’m not into white guys sry

starbuckers:

What if all of our moms ran our blogs for a day